The Strength You Gave Me

Tags

200 words, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, family, growing up, lessons, life, Life's like that, living in the moment, Margot Schwenk, mistakes, Mom, Mother's Day, parents, Relationships, strength, strong, Stuff my parents used to say and do

Margot with Diana

The more a daughter knows the details of her mother’s life […] the stronger the daughter.

― Anita Diamant, The Red Tent

On Mother’s Day I think of you. Of all the things you gave me. All the things you taught me. All the ways you sacrificed so I could have a good childhood.

And I did mom. So much better than the life you had as a child. I know you sometimes recount all the mistakes you think you made with us. But don’t you know that you gave so much more than you could ever have dreamt for yourself when you were a child? Don’t you know that you broke the cycle of alcoholism and abuse allowing your children to never have to know that torment?

And your strength, even now. Even in this time when you face the harsh reality you never dreamed would happen alone, instead of the plans you had with dad for your golden years, even now I see that strength. That strength you taught me in deed and in word. The strength that I have inside me because of you.

Thanks for that Mom.

Happy Mother’s Day.

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

The Ring With The Blue Stone

Tags

children, Dad, death, Diana Schwenk, family, foundation, gift, good character, grief, growing up, History, Hump Day Chronicles, lessons, life, Life's like that, love, memories, Mom, parenting, safe, Stuff my parents used to say and do, values

My parents in 1960 and the ring with the blue stone

When you want to build something, you start with a good foundation. When you want to understand something, you start with the fundamental pillars of the subject. In other words, you learn the history, the mechanics of it, the whys and whats and wheres.

In the same way,  when you feel lost, it helps to go back to where you began so you can remember where you came from, what you have learned about this business of living, what you truly long for in life, and how you can get it and how you can share your gifts with the world. Sometimes you grab onto a symbol of the past and carry it with you like a talisman that you can look at, or touch when you need to be grounded.

Since Dad passed away, I’ve been in kind of a fog. I got the basics covered, you know…  I wake up, brush my teeth, shower, dress, exercise, go to work, eat, go to bed and start it all over again the next day. 

But I’ve lost a bit of my oomph.

A bit of my zest for life.

Dad was always my rock.

He had this way of making me feel secure and letting me know that he was there for me, no matter what.

My Plan B, if Plan A should fail.

Although I rarely resorted to Plan B, I knew I could if I had to, I knew it was there if I needed it.  

This past New Year’s Eve, as I was deciding which piece of jewelry to wear for an event I was attending, I came across the ring with the blue stone. The ring that cost forty dollars in 1960 and took Dad several weeks of saving so he could buy it for Mom to celebrate their first anniversary.

Dad was so upset when Mom gave me that ring almost thirty years later. But I’m so glad she did, so I could find it on the last day of 2016 and slip it on my finger. And with the wearing of it, remember the values he taught me and the traits he exemplified; like a good work ethic, empathy, diplomacy, loyalty and strength of character.  

What a gift!

What a great foundation from which to find my way again!

~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~

Those Blue Shorts Dad Used to Wear

Tags

British Columbia, Canada, Dad, Diana Schwenk, dreams, family, growing up, Hump Day Chronicles, Life's like that, love, memories, Mom, parents, Pinantan Lake, Relationships, Stuff my parents used to say and do

The other day in the early hours of the morning I was sleeping and in my dream Dad was waking me up. I opened my eyes and he was wearing those blue shorts he used to wear and an undershirt. It was a younger version of Dad and he was handing me a gift…

I woke up thinking, I got to remember this dream and the gift. Later in the day I’d forgotten the gift. I should have written it down when I woke up.

“Those blue shorts. Man I saw him clear as day in that dream,”  I thought to myself. And then yesterday after work,  I remembered I had a picture of him, wearing those shorts and an undershirt!

Mom was always good at taking pictures. I still joke that if I go to the bathroom, I have to lock the door to prevent Mom from coming in to take a picture. But back in 1985, Mom and Dad came to visit me in Pinantan Lake. They’d flown to Calgary, rented a car and drove through the Rocky Mountains to see me.

Mom with Dad wearing those blue shorts and undershirt

Dad, me and Mom at Paul Lake

Me, Shannon and Dad

Mom and Dad on the last day of their visit to Pinantan Lake

It occurs to me as I write  this post, that Dad was two years younger than I am today back then and in my dream it’s sort of like two peers connected for a moment in time. And maybe that’s all the gift I really need to remember. I miss you so much Dad, thanks for visiting in my dreams.

~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~

Have you ever looked at picture of your parents at the age you are now and wondered what it would have been like to hang out with them as peers?

Happy Mother’s Day Mom!

Tags

200 words, children, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, family, growing up, happy, health, integrity, joy, kids, kindness, life, love, memories, Mom, Mother's Day, parents, Relationships, Stuff my parents used to say and do

Margot with Diana

No language can express the power, and beauty, and heroism, and majesty of a mother’s love. It shrinks not where man cowers, and grows stronger where man faints, and over wastes of worldly fortunes sends the radiance of its quenchless fidelity like a star.

Edwin Hubbell Chapin

For making our lives a 1000 times better than yours had been.

For baking a European-quality cake every Sunday and feeding it to us for breakfast with a vitamin every morning.

For preparing delicious home-cooked meals every day and cooking our favourite meal on our birthdays.

For reading to us every night. For singing ‘You are my Sunshine.’ For brushing my hair while we watched TV. For helping us with our homework. For teaching us manners, good work ethic, respect, honesty and integrity.

For making sure that we went on outings to get fresh air by visiting the zoo, going on a picnic, going to the park, going to the beach, going on a bike ride, taking a walk and so many other things. Things that you did not experience as a child.

For all these things and more, thank you and Happy Mother’s Day Mom!

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

Happy 77th Birthday Mom!

Tags

Berlin, Birthday, Canada, children, family, Germany, growing up, happy, joy, kids, laughter, life, Life's like that, living in the moment, love, memories, Mom, parents, Relationships, Stuff my parents used to say and do

Mom as a little girl with her mother

The oldest of six children, mom was born in Berlin, Germany the year WWII started.

Not an ideal childhood, but there were those special moments with her favourite grandparents, those rare moments where she could enjoy a piece of chocolate and the hospital stays that made her want to be a nurse.

And then the family years. Getting married. Having children of her own. Making a new and better life in Canada.

I have many memories growing up, like when Mom would tear around the house looking for her rat tail comb so she could finish setting her hair in rollers; all the while the comb was safely fixed in between the rows of curlers on her head.

Or how she’d barely be in the door after work and we’d all be like, “what’s for supper?” She’d sing to us, with us, read to us, take care of us when we were sick, threaten us with the wooden spoon to make us eat porridge, bake a cake every Sunday and feed it to us for breakfast with a vitamin.

And oh those cleaning days on Saturday, stripping, washing and waxing the floor, dragging the mattresses downstairs and beating them on the balcony, vacuuming, dusting, filling the sink with water to wash all the knick  knacks, washing the laundry in the wringer washing machine and hanging the laundry on the line – cleaning day was like boot camp!

Waiting up for me when I came home past curfew; lights flicking on blinding me, asking where I’ve been, why I was late, did I have any idea how worried she’d been? what was I thinking? Never mind, just get to bed! And by the way, you’re grounded for the summer – which never really panned out because grounding me meant I’d be around all the time and I was quite the pain in the ass!

Cooking our favourite meal, making our favourite cake on our birthdays, always motivated by wanting to be the kind of mother she had wanted to have as a child.

Wish I could cook for you today Mom. Wish I could bake your favourite cake. Wish we didn’t live so far apart.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Happy Birthday Mom. I know you don’t feel like celebrating and I understand. But you are worth celebrating. I am grateful for you and I hope you have some moments of joy today.

With love, Diana

Do You Remember Your Childhood Dream?

Tags

childhood, Diana Schwenk, dreams, family, growing up, Hump Day Chronicles, job, kids, memories, Mom, parents, passion, Purpose, Stuff my parents used to say and do

Mom dreamt of being a nurse

THE VERY FIRST DREAM I can remember having for my life was to be a rancher. I loved and wanted to be around horses. I imagined a picturesque piece of land with a quaint house, beautiful trees, a  river running out back and pastures filled with horses as far as the eye could see.

Other dreams I entertained included: being a veterinarian, psychiatrist, and the first female Prime Minister in Canada.

Needless to say, I did not become any of those things.

We can usually recall our own childhood dreams, but how many of us know what our parents dreamt of being?

It’s funny how most of us can’t even imagine our parents before our birth. It’s as if they never were children, didn’t exist before us at all.

Recently, Mom shared her childhood dream with me.

My mom grew up in Berlin during WWII. Some of her best memories include having to be hospitalized because she’d lost a good deal of her hearing due to ear infections. It was a time before Penicillin and so her ear infections resulted in damaged ear drums.

It was also a time of not enough food, or clothing, or warmth in the winter. And so staying in a hospital – even with a painful ear infection and in spite of significant hearing loss – was amazing and came with one’s own bed, three meals per day and nurses caring for you around the clock.

And so my mom dreamt of being a nurse. Someone who could care for children and make them feel as good as the nurses of her childhood made her feel.

~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~

What was your childhood dream? Did you achieve it? Do you know what your parents’ dreams were?

Morning Coffee

Tags

blessing, coffee, comforting, Dad, Diana Schwenk, dream, family, grace, grief, Hump Day Chronicles, living in the moment, loss, love, memories, Mom, parents

It’s only been a short time since Dad passed away. The hardest is when I forget and then remember again that he is gone. This morning though, a small blessing, a moment of grace to start my day.

A comforting dream, just before I awoke.

I was walking from the back bedroom of their house toward the kitchen. And there was Dad, just as he’d always been when I’d been there on previous visits, except he was standing – with no pain on his face, wearing that white shirt with navy and red stripes and making me an instant morning coffee.

Mom joined him from the dining room and both of them lifted their eyes up from the coffee to greet me.

Then I woke up.

Thanks for my morning coffee and checking in on me Dad. You must have known how much I am missing you.

~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~

Once Upon A Time – The Story of My Life

Tags

Alberta, brother, Calgary, Canada, children, Dad, Diana Schwenk, family, Germany, growing up, humour, Hump Day Chronicles, life, memories, Mom, parents, Relationships, stories

Long, long ago in a land called Germany

ONCE UPON A TIME, LONG, LONG AGO in a land called Germany, a boy and girl fell in love and married. The newly weds travelled by ship across the great ocean to start a family in a foreign land called Canada.

And then a lollipop- sucking son to complete the family.

The daughter and son loved each other very much in spite of the sword play at 2:14PM. Don’t believe me? Click on the photo to enlarge it.

From bonding over lollipops, the daughter and son learned sword play and other things and thrived in the new land across the great ocean.

Then lots of other stuff happened.

The children grew up and left the nest.

The son stayed in the area and the daughter travelled thousands of miles across the country to make a life in the west.

More time passed and the family made many visits back and forth to maintain their ties.

The son had a son. The daughter had a daughter.

By now you have guessed that I am the daughter of the boy and girl who married long, long ago in the land called Germany and travelled by ship across the great ocean to start a family.

And the early part of my story with my daughter, Michaela continues below on one of our visits back home across the great land.

Playing piano at Oma and Opa’s house

Sitting on a rock in the woods with Opa

Sitting on a log in the woods with Oma

Oh how Oma and Opa loved when Michaela played piano, they could hardly wait for her to wake up and play it again. And Oma and Opa and Michaela and Max, the white dog, enjoyed walks in the woods and sitting on rocks and logs.

And back out west our lives carried on and Michaela asked many questions and thought deeply about the mysteries of life.

Michaela stares into the distance pondering the meaning of life at the Bow River

There’s got to be more to life than riding the horsey…

maybe it’s all about being cool. I look cool like this, right?

Haha I gotcha! I’ll just be myself.

I’ll just hang out with Mommy for now, and figure out life another day

Playing Hop Scotch in Calgary, Alberta

And the story continues and lots of other stuff still happens on the west side of the great land that lays across the great ocean by the land called Germany where long, long ago a boy and girl fell in love and were married.

~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~

What’s your story?

Happy 75th Birthday Mom!

Tags

75th Birthday, family, Mom, Relationships

The other day Mom told me there were no special plans for her birthday. She said that’s OK, no big deal…even as a child she was told…don’t expect anything today, you will have to wait until Christmas.

That’s what happens when your birthday is so close to Christmas, I guess.

I couldn’t let the 75th go by without at least a mention here on my blog though!

Mom is a doer.

She does for others, makes sure their birthdays are acknowledged.

At 75 she is still caring for others. She is the one who is caring for Dad as he recovers from the surgery he had in September. Thank you for doing that Mom!

She is the glue that connects her siblings in Germany. And the glue that keeps our immediate family connected too.

Wish I could be there to celebrate your birthday in person Mom. Know that I am with you in spirit and wishing you the very best of everything!

Love ya!

Diana xo