In Those Times

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200 words, anger, caring, compassion, courage, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, Fear, goodness, greater good, hatred, hope, humility, integrity, kindness, Life's like that, love, making a difference, peace, Purpose, Relationships, Truth, vulnerability, world issues

Remember:
Kindness is for all times in all situations – not just when it suits you.

-Audray Landrum

Those times in life when it seems that evil continually prevails, when greedy people keep getting, and vulnerable people keep losing.

Those times when those who don’t follow the rules keep winning, when those who prey on weaknesses are exulted, when those who feel entitled are granted whatever they wish, and those whose genuine efforts and unselfish motives are overlooked time after time.

Those times when I can’t bear to watch anymore, when my anger overtakes me, when for just once, for just one God damned time, my utter hatred of their actions, my complete disdain of them, my raging judgment of them makes me want to squash them, to shine a light on their selfishness, expose their nakedness to every single person, and humiliate them in front of the world.

In those times, although it’s excruciatingly difficult, I must dig deep inside of myself with humility, recognize those same tendencies in me and acknowledge my own shortcomings. I must search for the good in them, reach out with love and kindness and pray it makes a difference.

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

Somebody Cares

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alone, caring, children, courage, daughters, family, Fear, growing up, kids, kindness, love, memories, only human, passion, shame, strong, vulnerability, weak

The other day, my beautiful daughter, Michaela, posted the letter below on her Facebook page.

If you are in your tweens/teens and feel alone, please know that you are not the first to feel like you don’t quite measure up. Things will probably get better and the things you’re learning now are making you stronger.

If you are the parent of a tween/teen remind them every day how much you love them and not just because they’re you’re kid and you have to, but because he or she is a beautiful person worthy of love.

Dear 12-year-old Michaela,

The first thing I want you to know is no matter how alone you feel right now, no matter how much you think nobody cares, your mom is your best friend and she gets you.

Being chubby is not the end of the world. I’m sorry that your peers seem to think it is. Fat does not equal ugly. Being mean and cruel is ugly. You are beautiful.

I know something really bad just happened to you. I know you’re scared. I know you are ashamed. Talk about it. Tell people. Talk to a counsellor. It’s not your fault. I promise you it’s not your fault.

I know you think you’ll never be one of the pretty girls. You are a pretty girl. Nobody needs to tell you. You have a beautiful heart, and soul and your outsides are beautiful too. Stop comparing yourself to them. You’re nothing like them.

Not everyone is going to like you, and that is so far beyond ok. It’s nothing you did. I know how hard you’re trying but sometimes people just don’t click. Michaela, let it go.
The sooner you learn to love yourself and that you are worthy of love, the happier you will be. It’s hard, it’s so so hard. But it’s coming.

Don’t feel ashamed for talking to a therapist. They are there to help you and everyone should. Shit gets hard, Michaela. You’re not weak, you’re human. Don’t be afraid to move. It’s not going to be perfect but so much good will come out of it, it doesn’t even matter.

Tell people you love them. It’s not lame. If you feel it, say it. It will change people and people will love you for it. Don’t ever be afraid to love.

Be proud of who you are, Michaela. You’re good enough. In fact, you’re so far beyond just enough. You are kind, and generous and sweet. You have so much love to give. Give it. It will come back in waves.

Never stop playing sports. I know there will be a time where it feels like you don’t even have time to breathe, but when you get that time back, get back to it.

On the same note, never stop doing what you love. Don’t let anyone’s darkness steal your passion. Your passion and joy is amazing. It isn’t lame. Screw anyone who says it is.

12-year-old me, I love you. I’m so sorry it’s so hard right now. I’m sorry you feel alone but people love you. You have no idea how good it’s going to get so please don’t be afraid. You are so beautiful. You are worthy. You are amazing. I love you, girl. It’s going to be ok.

Thank you Michaela for allowing me to share your beautiful letter on my blog. I hope it will help someone else to not feel so alone and hopeless.

Love you kiddo,

MOM ❤

~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~

Vulnerability and Truth

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200 words, anger, believe, courage, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, emotions, Fear, growing up, happy, health, integrity, kindness, life, love, peace, strong, Truth, weak, worry

“Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage aren’t always comfortable, but they’re never weakness.”

― Brené Brown

It’s scary to be vulnerable, isn’t it? It makes you feel weak, and even worse it makes you appear weak to others.

Suppose you don’t know what to do about a situation at work, if you ask for help, would it seem like you cannot do the job you were hired to do?

Suppose you are grieving the loss of someone close to you, or are worried about the circumstances a loved one has found themselves in, if you talk about it or cry, would it seem as though you are too emotional?

What if you’re afraid to go to the dentist, or a job interview, or know you need to admit you were wrong about something, if you hesitate or show any anxiety, would you look like a coward?

I grew up believing it did. Crying was weak. Smiling or laughing made you look foolish. The only acceptable emotion was anger, which somehow proved that you were strong.

It can take years to finally know that vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage.

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

You Have More In Common With The World Than You Think

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200 words, common ground, community, connecting, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, differences, DNA, doing the right thing, family, Fear, in common, justice, life, love, Relationships, talents, vulnerability

We are like islands in the sea, separate on the surface but connected in the deep.

William James (1842-1910)

The things that make people interesting are their unique talents. Like someone whose guitar playing moves us, or someone whose storytelling captivates us, whose art transports us, whose passion inspires us to change the course we’re on.

Sadly some things that make us different also divide us, like the colour of our skin, our level of education, our societal status, our culture, our belief system. Different takes us out of our comfort zone, makes us feel vulnerable. The unknown is frightening.

So we vilify those who aren’t like us. ‘They’ are less civilized, less intelligent than us. We create rules and laws that hurt them. We find ways to protect ourselves from them while overlooking the injustices we impose upon them.

The above quote is a good metaphor to clearly illustrate how we are all connected. What will it take for us to remember that although we are separate on the surface, we are very connected in the deep?

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES

I am so moved when the woman in the video learns she has a cousin in the room…

 

The Trump Effect

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anxiety, being present, chaos, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, Donald Trump, Fear, future, growing up, human behaviour, human nature, humanity, illusion of control, impatient, integrity, life, Life's like that, living in the moment, panic, peace, politics, Truth

You lose your grip and then you slip into the masterpiece.

~ Leonard Cohen

I’d like to tell you that I’m even-tempered. That I keep a cool head when my patience or my sense of right and wrong are being tested. That the minute I feel my jaw clench in anger, I am able to say some kind of catch phrase like Breathe or Let It Go and I’m magically transported to the present where the stuff I’m losing my cool about hasn’t happened yet and may never ever happen at all. But I’d be lying.

Truth is, this is something I’m always trying to grow into and although I’m getting better at it, I may never master it. But that’s ok as long as I’m trying, right?

What seems funny to me is that when I’m in the midst of ‘losing it,’ I feel perfectly justified. Yet when I see someone else behave in a similar manner, My mouth forms the word WOW and I think to myself, ‘What a wacko.’

The Donald and how some of us react to him is a good example of this. “Oh those bad Canadians, they’re really screwing us over in the milk industry and softwood lumber industry by doing this and that and the bad Mexicans, something to do with chickens blah, blah, blah…and so I’m going to renegotiate to get us a better deal or just pull out of NAFTA all together.”

And then chaos ensues and people are running around to research if what he is saying is really true and if he can actually do what he says he going to do and the news is consumed with the silliest debates, things we all thought we were clear on like is the sky really blue and we wonder well is it and then we think, hey wait a minute… Ugh I GOT CAUGHT UP IN THIS AGAIN!

I’m seriously starting to wonder if he is a genius in the sense that he can so easily get us so wound up and I bet he’s having a nap, or reading the paper or doing laps in a pool, or worse working on something he doesn’t want the public to know about, while we are reacting to a non issue!

Well as it turns out, he can’t just pull out of NAFTA. The worst he can do is sign an executive order that indicates he would like to pull out in six months and then it would go through this huge process and many others would have to want to do the same – bottom line – it’s a process that goes way beyond Donald’s mere wishes…

Anyway, my point really has nothing to do with NAFTA or Donald Trump or politics or how we should navigate these issues. It merely serves as a globally recognizable example of something I struggle with daily – to not immediately react to a situation, to not get pulled into someone else’s chaos, to just breathe, stay in the present and respond in a caring and appropriate way.

` DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

What’s the thing you struggle with? Can you think of a good Trump illustration for it? 😉

The Little House Sparrow

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courage, Diana Schwenk, dreams, Fear, God, kindness, living in the moment, love, My Creator, Purpose, trust, vulnerability

This morning, just before I awoke, I dreamt of a little House Sparrow.

She appears suddenly from behind the curtain in my living room. As I wonder how I might best get her back outside, she flies toward me and lands on my hand which is casually propped up by my elbow on the armrest of my chair.

Amazed and delighted by her courage, I chance a quick look at her, not wanting to scare her. Her little heart is pounding; she does not look at me. In an instant I know that she knows her only way out of this dilemma is me. I could be her savior or I could be the end of her. She has concluded, however, that at least she has a chance of getting back out if she just gathers up her courage and trusts me.

“Open the window,” I say.

And then I woke up.

It occurs to me now, as I reflect on this dream, how often I have found myself in a situation where I have had to let go of my fear and trust the one, who could both save me and destroy me, to get me out of my dilemma.

Wishing you all a happy Sunday filled with trust and gratitude!  ❤

Diana xo

The Dance

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200 words, believe, compassion, courage, danger, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, enabling, Fear, growing up, happy, health, integrity, joy, kindness, living in the moment, love, mission, Purpose, sacrifice, world issues

How can we know the danger from the dance?

~ William Butler Yeats

How do you recognize the difference between what is good for you and bad for you? Does fun mean bad? Does safe mean good?

How do you balance security and risk? When is it best to tread carefully? When should you throw caution to the wind?

How do you evaluate your need and their need? When do you sacrifice yourself for the good of someone else? When do your sacrifices border enabling?

Living only for our own comfort is the worst kind of extravagance; and truly brings no satisfaction in the end. And a life of consistently compromising ourselves to accommodate the agendas of others only serves to annihilate us and the gifts we could share with the world.

Can we ever really know the danger from the dance? I don’t think we can. At least not until our decisions finally play themselves out. But a really good indicator that we’re making the right decision may be to question our motives for the choices we make.

Am I acting from a place of love or am I acting from a place of fear?

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

How Do You See The World?

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200 words, alive, beauty, community, courage, creating, creativity, danger, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, dream, end of the world, Fear, generosity, happy, hope, kindness, life, living, living in the moment, love, Purpose, safe, vulnerability, world issues

Loving people live in a loving world. Hostile people live in a hostile world. Same world.

~ Wayne Dyer

IN MANY WAYS, WE LIVE WITH what we dream and create. Our lives reflect the energy we’ve been putting into them. If we believe people are always out to get us, that is the scenario we unwittingly create and see. If we believe that people are good at heart, that is what we tend to nurture in others and see.

Does that mean if we’ve always believed the world to be hostile, there’s no love in it? Or if we’ve always been loving, there is no hostility in the world? No. But that’s likely what we’re inclined to ‘notice’ more in our daily lives.

One might think that it’s only those who are safe and loved that can see a loving world, but in my experience, it’s often those who are vulnerable and in danger who see the love in the world.

Anne Frank, whose family faced mortal danger, took the time to jot down these words: “I still believe, in spite of everything, that people are truly good at heart.”

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

How do you see the world?

Lucky To Be Alive

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200 words, alive, bigger purpose, community, compassion, courage, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, family, Fear, humanity, life, Life's like that, lifetime, living in the moment, love, miracle, mission, odds, Relationships, respect, responsibility

I love life because what more is there?

~Anthony Hopkins

Life is the most amazing miracle ever! You and I are pretty lucky just to be alive. The odds of our parents even meeting were 1 in 20,000. The odds that they would stay together long enough to have children were 1 in 2000.

And that’s just your parents, the odds are so much smaller when you consider all the other variables!

We could spend our entire lifetimes just marveling about how our heart pumps blood through our vessels, how our lungs take in oxygen and expel carbon dioxide, the way our body works to sustain and repair itself and keep us going without any conscious effort on our part.

If you think about it, it is really quite remarkable!

But life is so much more than that. Life is about learning how to love and respect ourselves, our loved ones, our neighbours, our beautiful planet, and all the abundant life that exists on its surface. Life provides us an opportunity to exercise compassion, practice sacrifice, overcome fear and grow in courage and humility.

I do not want to squander my time here. How about you?

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

The Odds Infographic

My Name

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answers, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, Fear, just ask, lessons, Lhasa, life, love, miracle, Purpose, questions, Relationships, safe, strong, waiting, weak

Why don’t you ask me

How long I’ve been waiting

Set down on the road

With the gunshots exploding

I’m waiting for you

In the gloom and the blazing

I’m waiting for you

I sing like a slave I know

I should know better

I’ve learned all my lessons

Right down to the letter

And still I go on like this

Year after year

Waiting for miracles

And shaking with fear 

Why don’t you answer

Why don’t you come save me

Show me how to use

All these things

That you gave me

Turn me inside out

So my bones can save me

Turn me inside out 

You’ve come this close

You can come even closer

The gunshots get louder

And the world spins faster

And things just get further

And further apart

The head from the hands

And the hands from the heart 

One thing that’s true

Is the way that I love him

The earth down below

And the sky up above him

And still I go on like this

Day after day

Still I go on like this 

Now I’ve said this

I already feel stronger

I can’t keep waiting for you

Any longer

I need you now

Not someday

When I’m ready

Come down on the road

Come down on the road 

My name, my name

Nothing is the same

I won’t go back

The way I came  

~ Lhasa De Sela

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~