In Those Times

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200 words, anger, caring, compassion, courage, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, Fear, goodness, greater good, hatred, hope, humility, integrity, kindness, Life's like that, love, making a difference, peace, Purpose, Relationships, Truth, vulnerability, world issues

Remember:
Kindness is for all times in all situations – not just when it suits you.

-Audray Landrum

Those times in life when it seems that evil continually prevails, when greedy people keep getting, and vulnerable people keep losing.

Those times when those who don’t follow the rules keep winning, when those who prey on weaknesses are exulted, when those who feel entitled are granted whatever they wish, and those whose genuine efforts and unselfish motives are overlooked time after time.

Those times when I can’t bear to watch anymore, when my anger overtakes me, when for just once, for just one God damned time, my utter hatred of their actions, my complete disdain of them, my raging judgment of them makes me want to squash them, to shine a light on their selfishness, expose their nakedness to every single person, and humiliate them in front of the world.

In those times, although it’s excruciatingly difficult, I must dig deep inside of myself with humility, recognize those same tendencies in me and acknowledge my own shortcomings. I must search for the good in them, reach out with love and kindness and pray it makes a difference.

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

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Vulnerability and Truth

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200 words, anger, believe, courage, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, emotions, Fear, growing up, happy, health, integrity, kindness, life, love, peace, strong, Truth, weak, worry

“Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage aren’t always comfortable, but they’re never weakness.”

― Brené Brown

It’s scary to be vulnerable, isn’t it? It makes you feel weak, and even worse it makes you appear weak to others.

Suppose you don’t know what to do about a situation at work, if you ask for help, would it seem like you cannot do the job you were hired to do?

Suppose you are grieving the loss of someone close to you, or are worried about the circumstances a loved one has found themselves in, if you talk about it or cry, would it seem as though you are too emotional?

What if you’re afraid to go to the dentist, or a job interview, or know you need to admit you were wrong about something, if you hesitate or show any anxiety, would you look like a coward?

I grew up believing it did. Crying was weak. Smiling or laughing made you look foolish. The only acceptable emotion was anger, which somehow proved that you were strong.

It can take years to finally know that vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage.

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

ALIVE – My Word For 2017

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200 words, alive, anger, authentic, believe, courage, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, Fear, grief, integrity, joy, laughter, living in the moment, real, Relationships, sadness, true to yourself

Try to learn to breathe deeply, really to taste food when you eat, and when you sleep, really to sleep. Try as much as possible to be wholly alive with all your might, and when you laugh, laugh like hell. And when you get angry, get good and angry. Try to be alive. You will be dead soon enough.

Ernest Hemingway

I love this Hemingway quote. It calls me to be present in the NOW and to give all of myself to the moment at hand. And not only that, it dares me to fully experience the moment using all of my senses – to be wholly alive.

Life is sweet. Just to be here is a wonderful thing – even in difficult times. The odds were stacked against me to even be born! Yet here I am, and how easy it is to take my life for granted, to forsake what is right in front of me for what was, or what may, or may not be.

Alive.

I can feel my blood pumping through my veins just saying it! And so I know, it’s the perfect word for me in 2017.

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

My words for previous years

The Bird Lady

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aging, alone, anger, Calgary, caring, compassion, courage, Diana Schwenk, feeding birds, Hump Day Chronicles, kindness, living in the moment, love, neighbour, Relationships, weak

photo credit: sodahead.com

SHE SPOKE TO ME ONCE on a warm summer day. I was sitting on my balcony drinking coffee. She pointed at the house next door. A yellow notice was fastened to the fence, it said that the property was being re-zoned for business. She didn’t like that, said she wasn’t sure what that would mean for the neighbourhood…

~

I’m guessing she’s well into her 80’s and it would surprise me if she weighs 100 pounds. There’s a nervous energy about her – always looking around and jumpy at the sign of any noise or movement. I have never seen anyone visit her and suspect she is alone in this world.

Truth be told, she has an abrasive way about her. On some days, I have avoided any eye contact, not willing to endure her wrath. I’ve watched her as she drives her car slowly around the block, hazard lights blinking, and stops in the middle of the street in front of my place to the irritation of many a driver behind her. When they honk their horn, she gestures angrily for them to pass. She carefully opens the car door, checks both ways and crosses the street slowly as if unsure of her footing. Holding my breath for fear that she might be hit by a car, I’ve willed her to cross the street quickly in my mind.

Once a man from the city’s parking authority approached her to ask her to move her car off the street. I remember thinking, ‘uh oh, this isn’t gonna be pretty.’  Much to my surprise though, in a strained, airy voice she pleasantly agreed to do so and walked to her car. When he had rounded the corner, she – perhaps in defiance, left her car where it was and fed the birds before returning to her car and driving home.

~

…SHE SHUFFLED CLOSER to my balcony. So frail, she looked like she might tip over – like a gust of wind might knock her down. She told me in a whisper, as if her next words were a secret, that her best friend, who had passed away some time back used to live in my apartment. They used to visit and sprinkle bird seed under that exact tree right in front of my place.

I’d seen her feed the birds many times over the years, even on the coldest days. I knew she lived down the street and had wondered why she didn’t feed them at her place. Now I knew – she was honouring the memory of a friend.

~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~

I saw her again last night. I don’t even know her name. I think I need to rectify that.

HEY BOZO that’s my parking spot!

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200 words, anger, blessed, Calgary, compassion, Diana Schwenk, First World Problems, kindness, Parking space, perspective

I felt sorry for myself because I had no shoes – until I met a man who had no feet ~ Jewish proverb.

It had been a long week.

I’d been fighting that nasty bug going around.

I’d had my head stuck in numbers and policies and although this is necessary work and I appreciate its value, I was tired and happy to be going home.

When I got home, my parking spot was blocked by another vehicle.

I felt my blood pressure rise along with my temper and wrote a note that said

“… you’re blocking my spot, can you please call me when you move!”

I found a two-hour parking zone down the block and marched home like a crazy woman on a mission with anger burning in my heart.

Then I remembered that there are those who…

can’t afford a car

don’t have a job

or don’t have a home.

By the time the guy called to say, “I’m so sorry, I thought I’d only be a moment, I’m gone now…”

I replied with, “…thank you so much, no worries!”

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

How is it that I often forget how truly blessed I am?