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aging, Canada, caring, compassion, courage, Dad, Diana Schwenk, family, growing up, health, health care, Hump Day Chronicles, joy, kindness, life, love, memories, pain, parents, world issues
My dad worked hard all his life and has been quietly suffering these last two years.
He has several degenerative discs that are being squeezed out of his back and no amount or type of medication has relieved his pain.
Most recently, the only time he doesn’t feel pain is when he’s laying down.
Doctors say that once his discs have been squeezed out, he’ll be pain-free – his back will be stiff – but he’ll be pain-free.
In the meantime, his leg muscles are atrophying. He only has about ten percent muscle left in his right leg; and even before he got laid up, he was using a walker.
As a young father, dad worked long days, six days per week making margarine at Kraft Foods. Back then employers weren’t as aware about proper lifting and safety at the workplace. It wasn’t unusual for dad to lift and carry 100 lb. bags of salt up a step-ladder to pour the contents into a vat. He often had back pain and tension headaches in those days.
Years of heavy lifting and hard work resulted in his troubles today.
“No one needs to be in pain these days, there must be something that can be done. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life on the couch,” he recently told me on the phone.
Not too long ago, we learned that there might be something else we can do. The hospital could administer several painful cortisone shots into his spine with the hope that he could be pain-free for up to six months.
But there is a waiting list. It could take six months or more before he would get in.
I was irate to say the least.
When I was a child, I was petrified of doctors. The only person I trusted to tend to my ouchies was dad. He called himself ‘Dr. Heinz’ – Heinz is his given name – just like the ketchup, he used to say.
Once I cut my right hand between my ring and middle finger on a rock while playing in a lake. I feared the worst. I was sure I would need stitches. It was a bloody mess and I could see bone. But Dr. Heinz gently cleaned and bandaged the wound, then bound the two fingers together with gauze and medical tape.
And it worked – the wound healed!
Some forty-plus years later, every time I look at that tiny scar I think of dad. He always took such good care to doctor me up.
Every day that dad can’t walk because of pain, his muscles deteriorate even more. I can’t doctor him up, but enough is enough – I had to do something!
So I made a few phone calls to the hospital in Ontario. They have the referral from his family doctor. They know his medical history, but I wanted to tell them about the man who is my dad, who worked hard all his life, who deserves better than this; who deserves to live his last years with some enjoyment and quality of life.
And it worked. Or it is just a happy coincidence – I don’t really care which – but he’s scheduled to get his shots on Friday!
I couldn’t be happier if I tried.
So fingers crossed, and prayers for pain relief sent, I hope for the best. Good luck dad!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The sad truth is that Canada’s Health Care System doesn’t work anymore. Thousands wait for operations and procedures; many are the elderly; the very folks who worked their butts off to give us a better life. Canada was once recognized as one of the top countries in the world as far as healthcare and general well-being are concerned. Not so anymore. Something needs to be done. By the year 2041, seniors are expected to represent 25% of the population in Canada, let’s put something sustainable in place before then.
~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~
Related article: We’re all going to be seniors one day
kerbey said:
Health care is screwed up here in America, too, but I usually can get in to see the doctor the same day I call or the next day. Specialists like neurologists can take weeks, unless you bitch and moan, which I usually do. But our deductibles are crazy. Mine is $10,000 before insurance kicks in, so basically I pay every single bill, including a $4000 hospital bill from May, when they did a 5 min EKG to make sure my heart was healthy and sent me on my way. I have had back pain for 15 yrs and had several cortisone shots, years of physical therapy and chiropractic visits, to no avail. Fortunately, I can walk, so my heart goes out to your father. I am sorry that his muscles are atrophying. It must make him feel helpless. He is right that painkillers don’t touch back pain. Nothing I’ve tried ever takes the edge off. A young woman at church in her early 30s gets cortisone shots every three months, but still has a hard time leaving her home, due to pain levels. I surely hope he gets what he needs. Back pain is debilitating.
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks so much Kerbey – I hope you feel better soon though and I can’t believe you have such a high deductible! ❤
Diana xo
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peakperspective said:
I so hope your dad will find the pain relief he needs. Ugh, the sadness of watching your family members in pain is an awful thing to bear. My fingers are crossed this will all occur and soon.
I shall keep my fingers crossed Canada kicks into gear here.
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks! Dad got the shots and the pain is gone! ❤
Diana xo
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Jim McKeever said:
Good for you, Diana, for advocating for your dad. It’s maddening, I’m sure, that you had to do that. The same holds true in the U.S., where insurance companies and an often-heartless healthcare system dictate how human beings are cared for. Best of luck to you and your dad!
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks so much Jim. It’s a no-brainer for me; after all he took such good care of me. ❤
Diana xo
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Wyrd Smythe said:
Best wishes for better — for ideal! — outcomes for your dad, Lady Di!
Surprising to hear about Canada’s health system! It’s often held up as a shining example of a country that got it right (usually in contrast to how we, in the USA, got it so wrong). I wonder if some of this isn’t related to population growth. This world is starting to burst at the seams!
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dianasschwenk said:
Canada used to make it to the top 3 in healthcare and well being. I think it’s very related to our government Smitty. They’ve just cut another huge chunk of money from healthcare… ❤
Diana xo
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Wyrd Smythe said:
[sigh] It’s like almost nothing good ever lasts for long before someone goes and messes it up.
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The Presents of Presence said:
Glorious powerful you Diana! Thanks for sharing. Keeping your Dad (and your family and you) in my prayers xo
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks so much Yvonne! ❤
Diana xo
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rachelcarrera said:
Oh, Diana, that’s so awesome that your call worked! I hope he’s feeling much better now. Give Dr. Heinz a big hug for me! ❤
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dianasschwenk said:
Turns out it was just a pre-shots appointment. We have to wait another 3 weeks. Better than 6 months though, right? ❤
Diana xo
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earthriderjudyberman said:
I’m hoping that your Dad will soon get the medical attention that he needs and deserves. It’s frustrating to see our seniors (one of which I am) exhaust their life’s savings for medical needs. Or have to make a choice between paying for prescriptions or rent. In America – and I’m betting in Canada – our elected officials have access to excellent medical care. The same should be true for all, especially those who have worked hard all their lives.
Good for you – and lucky for your Dad – that you were able to get a friendly ear to listen to and then act on your requests. Bravo! 😉
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks Judy. Turns out it was a pre-needle appointment. He’s not getting the shots for another 3 weeks, still better than 6 months but we were all a bit disappointed. 😦
Diana xo
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elizabeth2560 said:
With my mother’s last illness, I too learned how one has to become an advocate for the well being of elderly parents. Well done you!
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you Elizabeth. Hugs. ❤
Diana xo
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Jean said:
I’m sorry to hear of your father’s pain. Re: dealing with hospitals and doctors: a person must advocate for the patient / patient must be armed with relevant good questions to press onward for good care.
Just letting you…it won’t be the last time to advocate for your father (or mother) for timely/quality health care. But know that you would anyway, Diana, regardless of the health care system.
Hope he makes time to walk every day. Every day with his walker. I’m just wondering if it’s worth for him to see the physiotherapy dept. on safe exercises for his legs. Remember it is this expertise, that helps stroke patients, severely injured folks regain use of some muscles, body movements.
I never knew the therapeutic services of physiotherapy until after my injury. Prior to that never used physiotherapy at all.
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks for all this information Jean. I trust you’re still healing well? ❤
Diana xo
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Wendy L. Macdonald said:
Way to go, Diana. You’re a good daughter.
Blessings ~ Wendy ❀
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks Wendy. Alas they only did a pre-needle examination today. He has to wait another 3 weeks for his shots. 😦
Diana xo
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Alan A. Malizia: Contagious Optimism! Co-Author said:
Diana, I’m happy for your dad that your persistence has paid off. It usually does; in matters of body and soul. Your dad seems to be a great man willing to make sacrifices for his family. And for that alone he deserves better.
I fear our Obamacare Health system is not far behind yours. Already the relationship between doctor and patient is experiencing unhealthy challenges. Too much gov’t is never a good thing.
As we are about to celebrate our 4th of July holiday, we must be reminded that it was tyranny that we fought to brake away from in preference of democracy.
Freedom begins to diminish when individual independence is exchanged for gov’t dependence.
-Alan
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dianasschwenk said:
An interesting perspective, thank you Alan! ❤
Diana xo
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markbialczak said:
Today’s the day for your Dad, Diana. I have my fingers crossed, and I’m sending my best thoughts toward that hospital in Ontario, so Heinz — like the ketchup — get the shots just right and the pain relief required for the quality of life he so richly deserves. ❤ Please, please, please!
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you dear Mark. ❤
Diana xo
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utesmile said:
You are a wonderful daughter and I am sure your parents are very proud of you. You love your dad very much just like I loved mine. I am so happy you got a result and I pray that the shots will give him a painfree time!
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you so much Ute!
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Ian Munro @ leadingessentially.com said:
What a great outcome! I’m happy for your dad! This is also a great example of asking for what you want, believing in it and receiving!
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks Ian, I hope it works! ❤
Diana xo
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bodhisattvaintraining said:
well done; and best wishes for Friday x
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you so much! ❤
Diana xo
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joannerambling said:
It is terrible that he is in so much pain, my mum has terrible back pain and has to take morphine and panadine forte to just be able to move it doesn’t take the pain away it just makes it bearable. Yes he does deserve better then this
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dianasschwenk said:
thank you and so does your mum. ❤
Diana xo
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Chatter Master said:
Oh Diana! I can sympathize with your dad, having had to have surgery for the same thing some years back. I wish I had great suggestions to help, my pain was mostly relieved by moving, sitting or standing still was horrific pain for me. I”m glad he’s getting his shots. Send him well wishes!!!
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you Colleen. I’m so sorry you had to go through that kind of pain. You’re doing well now? ❤
Diana xo
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Chatter Master said:
I am Diana. It was worth it, for me, to have surgery. Made a huge difference in my life. I had no restrictions after the healing was 100%. I hope your father gets that relief. Because I know that pain.
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dianasschwenk said:
Me too, thank you Colleen! ❤ Hey by the way, I've wanted to leave comments on some of your past posts but the comments were not enabled, so THANK YOU for the Happy Canada Day post!
Diana xo
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Chatter Master said:
🙂 You are VERY welcome!
And yes, I have turned off comments on some of my posts just because I am finding it difficult to keep up sometimes. So if I turn those off it gives me a little more time to get to other people’s posts. 🙂
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Graham With Hats said:
I’m sorry to hear about your Dad and hope the shots work. We are having a similar problem here with deteriorating health care. It seems such a shame after all the work to create a good working system.
You might like a look at a simple version of the Alexander Technique for the relief of back pain, here:-
Best wishes to your Dad. 🙂
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you Graham for you empathy and encouragement. It is much appreciated. ❤
Diana xo
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Healing Grief said:
Well done Diana. You made a big difference. I think so often people just accept that life is difficult and unfair. When we believe we deserve more and act on it, we get more! I hope these injections help relieve your Dad’s pain and increase his mobility. Much love 🙂
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dianasschwenk said:
Yes I think that may be true Karen and thank you for your well wishes. ❤
Diana xo
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Minuscule Moments said:
Sorry to hear that your Dad is not well, I hope he gets the help he needs and is pain free soon Diana. The waiting to see specialists etc is the same here too. The elderly who cannot afford private health insurance are effected the most.
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dianasschwenk said:
It’s so very sad, isn’t it Kath? I mean other cultures value their elderly… ❤
Diana xo
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Don said:
Well done Diana. I just admire your love and care for your dad. Wonderful that he well now get treatment.
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dianasschwenk said:
Aww thank you Don. He loved and cared for me once and still does, it’s as natural as breathing to want to help my folks. ❤
Diana xo
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russtowne said:
I’m glad your father will soon get the shots, Diana, and saddened that it takes so long for something so relatively basic. May his pain be greatly diminished and your country soon make major improvements to its healthcare system.
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you Russ, from your lips to God’s ears! ❤
Diana xo
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Maria F. said:
Physical therapy, that is if he can tolerate it. There are passive exercises done in bed, but I don’t know the threshold of his pain. This is to prevent the atrophy in the legs.
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you Maria. He had been doing exercises but most of them cause too much pain right now. I’m keeping my fingers crossed for a good outcome and a return to physio. ❤
Diana xo
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Maria F. said:
I’m sorry to hear. Hope he gets well.
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dianasschwenk said:
Me too, thank you Maria. ❤
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Army of Angels said:
So glad you were able to get him an earlier appointment for the shots! My dad suffers back pain as well. One thing he uses is a “TINS” (not sure if that is the correct spelling) unit. It is an electric stimulator-little electro pads go on his back, and the electrical current is turned on. It sounds harsh, but he says it helps. Can’t the doctors remove the discs surgically? I don’t know….you are doing a great thing, trying to give your dad a better quality of life.
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks Angel. My dad did try that stimulator thing. It didn’t really help. As for surgery, he’s in his 80s and I’m pretty sure this was discussed, pros and cons-wise and they decided against it. I hope and pray that the shots will work – thank you for dropping by and caring. ❤
Diana xo
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Army of Angels said:
I join you in prayer that the shots ease the pain.
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you.
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Don Royster said:
Sorry to hear about your dad. Glad you came up with a solution. Was thinking about something he could be doing when he is on the couch. Have you ever thought about asking him do an oral history of his life? It would be a wonderful gift to his family. You could give him a little recorder. They don’t way much. Write some open ended questions down for him to think on. Things like what was his childhood like and how he met your mother and how he got his job at Kraft. You could ask him what his favorite smell as a boy. What does that smell recall? As he feels up to it, he could answer them and/or make comments about his life. Then you could type them up, read them into a second recorder in the order you think they should go and he could listen to them. It would help him remember things and record them for a second go ’round. This would give his life some purpose.
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dianasschwenk said:
That’s a great idea Don – Wow! I live pretty far away, but I may mention that to him and see what he thinks. Have you done this with a parent, Don? ❤
Diana xo
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Don Royster said:
I have not. My mother has passed on and I never really knew my father. But I know some who are involved in local oral history projects.
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dianasschwenk said:
It’s a great idea and I think there is an app now for iphones where people can do this, in fact, terminal patients are leaving messages for loved ones… Sorry for your loss Don. ❤
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Don Royster said:
Thanks. It has been a long time.
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Jennifer's Journal said:
Diana, I have tears reading this. I hope and pray your dad gets relief on Friday from all that pain. Hugs!
I voiced that same sentiment – he deserves better than this – again and again when ALS felled my father. There is no justice or fairness when it comes to terminal or debilitating disease.
Try to enjoy Canada Day anyway, sweetie. ❤
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you so much Jennifer, I so appreciate your encouragement and compassion. HUGS! ❤
Diana xo
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Jennifer's Journal said:
Keep us posted on your dad, if you could.
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dianasschwenk said:
You bet. I’m somewhat holding my breath and continually thinking about Friday!
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mrs fringe said:
Oh Diana 😦 I’m wishing your dad the very, very best–and so glad to hear you were able to get him scheduled to begin the shots soon. I hope they make a huge difference. I am way too familiar with disc problems/pain, and the effects. (btw, I recently heard Botox shots are even more effective than the cortisone ones, just an idea to keep in your back pocket.) xoxo
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you mrs. f. I am hoping that you are getting some relief from pain too. I will keep that botox thing in mind – thanks! ❤
Diana xo
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Linda Constantineau said:
I am so relieved to hear this. George was having dinner with your parents and Michael last Saturday…at Stephanie’s in Hawkesbury..along with other friends. He was just saying…how Heinz hardly got up, let alone … Out … Anymore. He will be happy to hear this. Bless you for doing that extra step to care for someone I respect a lot and deserves the best.. 😊
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dianasschwenk said:
I know dad really misses seeing his friends, especially George. Let’s hope the shots do what they’re supposed to do, Linda – thanks for stopping by and caring about my parents. ❤
Diana xo
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vanbytheriver said:
They all deserve so much better, Diana, it is so hard to see loved ones suffer unnecessarily. Wonderful that you stepped up, it made a difference. That is how you honor your parent !! ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ Van
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks for your encouraging comment Van. ❤
Diana xo
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Val Boyko said:
Glad he is getting the treatment he needs. Being heard in a national health system isn’t easy. All the best for friday!
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you Val – I really hope so too! ❤
Diana xo
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Val Boyko said:
Your love and caring is such an inspiration Diana!
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jmgoyder said:
My worst fear for Anthony is physical pain so my heart goes out to you and your whole family regarding your dad’s suffering. It is fantastic that you have stepped in and changed things, Diana!
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks Julie. I really wasn’t expecting it to work out that way and I was already plotting my next moves, writing letters, contacting media, etc.
I hope the shots work. ❤
Diana xo
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