virus | talktodiana

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Almond, Amaretto, arguements, being right, catch a cold, correctors, Diana Schwenk, Disaronno, family, growing up, Hump Day Chronicles, kids, laughter, parents, Relationships, teens, virus

I come from a long line of Correctors.

(By the way,this post was inspired by 40 is the new 13 and my hasty comment here.)

Yes, I said Correctors, not Collectors – although Dad has collections of most everything.

When someone says something – anything at all, someone in my family will surely say, “Um, actually…”

A conversation I’ve had with Mom for forever is about how one actually catches a cold or flu.

This is the way one must dress in extreme weather in order to avoid a cold ~ Mom

Mom: You better dress warm or you’ll catch a cold.

Me: Um, actually…Mom, you catch a cold when you come into contact with the virus.

Mom: Dress warm dear!

Me: Mom! Did you hear me? You catch a cold when you come into contact with someone who has the virus!

Mom: (laughing) I heard you…dress warm you don’t want to catch a cold, do you?

As I’ve matured, it has become less important for me to be right – well most of the time. Maybe I need to let go of this 40 year discussion of catching colds. Maybe both of us are right. Maybe cold weather wreaks havoc on our immune system and then when we do come into contact with someone who has a cold, we catch it.

But then this age-old conversation, albeit with a new slant, resurfaces…

Me: Gee, I have a cold Mom.

Mom: Ha! I told you to stay away from so-and-so yesterday. I told you you would catch his cold but you didn’t want to listen, did you?

Me: Um, actually…Mom I didn’t catch his cold, it takes several days for the virus to incubate…so I didn’t catch HIS cold per se…

Mom: Yet you have a cold after spending time with him, don’t you?

Me: Mom, didn’t you hear me? It takes several days…

Mom: (interrupting) How do you know that??

Me: (rolling my eyes) Mom everyone knows that…

So why was I surprised when my own flesh-and-blood daughter became a Corrector – She can’t help it. It’s in her DNA – From the very moment she could talk she’s been correcting me!

This past Christmas Mom, Dad, Michaela and I were sitting around my parent’s diningroom table. We were playing a dice game and having a few drinks. Michaela was drinking Disaronno with Coke.

Dad: Disaronno is essentially Amaretto.

Me: No it’s not.

Michaela: Um, actually it is Mom, here taste it.

Dad: (grinning)

Me: Yuck that’s gross with Coke! But it does taste like Amaretto. You know…Amaretto is made from nuts – almonds to be exact…

Michaela: Um, actually Almonds are not nuts.

Me: Yes they are!

Michaela: Nope, they are the pit of a fruit most closely related to peaches and cherries.

Me: That’s ridiculous!

Michaela: (picks up phone, googles almonds and slides phone toward me)

Me: (puts on reading glasses and looks) Well I’ll be… how did you know that??

Michaela: (rolls eyes) Mom everyone knows that…