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~ Igniting the power and passion in others…

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Tag Archives: judging

Unbecoming

23 Sunday Oct 2016

Posted by dianasschwenk in Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, In My Opinion

≈ 45 Comments

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200 words, authentic, conform, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, Happiness, journey, judging, life, love, struggles, talents, true to yourself

Face of girl comes out of water surface only half

Maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything. Maybe it’s about unbecoming everything that isn’t really you, so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place.

If you’ve ever tried to please everyone at the same time, you probably know firsthand how utterly impossible it is to do so.

If you’ve ever tried to toe the company line when you didn’t necessarily agree with it, you are probably familiar with that unsettling feeling you get in your stomach when you are not being true to yourself.

Yet we spend a lot of our lives trying to squeeze ourselves into acceptable societal and familial moulds because it makes life easier, things just go more smoothly if we conform to the way things are.

We wonder what is wrong with us; that we don’t see things in the same way as the majority and we struggle to become who we think we are meant to be.

Are we actually struggling against ourselves?

Fortunately for me, the older I get, the less insecure I am about living my life authentically.

Maybe our journey is more about finally unbecoming everything we are not.

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

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Perspective

24 Sunday Apr 2016

Posted by dianasschwenk in Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, In My Opinion

≈ 25 Comments

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200 words, building community, community, Community engagement, compassion, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, division, human behaviour, humanity, integrity, judging, justice, love, perception, perspective, understanding

lioness-protects-cubs

When man calls an animal “vicious”, he usually means that it will attempt to defend itself when he tries to kill it.

Unattributed

As we encroach more on and more on wild animals and their habitats, we inevitably find ourselves in situations were animals have mauled people. Often the offending “vicious” animal is relocated or destroyed.

It got me thinking how that also happens in our interactions with each other when we perceive a threat to our way of being.

When we see ourselves as superior because of race, religion, no religion, social status, political affiliation, income tax bracket, level of education, gender, or any other form of discrimination.

When we justify our attacks on those who are not like us because we perceive them as a threat to our culture and way of life.

When we oppress the weak, the poor and the sick in our efforts to gain even more wealth for ourselves.

Yet, we are surprised at their indignation and “viciousness” when they retaliate; when they fight back to defend themselves and their children.

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

Think about it. If attacked, wouldn’t you fight back? Wouldn’t you protect your family and way of life?

Doing the Opposite of What I Intended

23 Wednesday Mar 2016

Posted by dianasschwenk in Hump Day Chronicles, My Stories

≈ 18 Comments

Tags

Alberta, Calgary, Canada, caring, community, compassion, Diana Schwenk, good intentions, Homelessness, human behaviour, judging, kindness, life, living in the moment, Purpose

untitled

YOU EVER GET THIS IDEA in your head and you think, “I’m going to do that,” and then it comes time to do it and you don’t do it?

Grrrr I could just give myself a good kick in the butt when that happens!

One of the luxuries (if you want to call it that) of living on this good earth for half a century and a bit though, is I know I’m not the only one who sets her mind to something and then craps out at the last-minute. Rather than beat myself up about it, I am confounded by it, in a scientist-observing-and-documenting kind of way.

Most Saturdays, I meet my friend Helga for coffee at 12:30 at the Starbucks on the second floor in The Core shopping Centre. We have this little thing we do to the barista, you know when they ask you your name? Helga tells them Hell and I tell them Heaven. We usually show up at different times so it’s fun to watch the barista’s face when whichever one of us is the second one shows up and supplies their name. But I digress.

Last Saturday, as I was getting ready to walk downtown and have coffee with Helga, I put a couple of twonies (the Canadian Two Dollar coin) in my front pocket with the intention of giving them to any homeless people asking for change during my walk. In particular, I was thinking of the two homeless men who usually sit under the underpass and panhandle on 4th street SW.

I know, I know, many folks think you shouldn’t give money to people who are living on the street but I do so occasionally, or buy someone a meal or something because it feels like the right thing to do.

Anyway…

With the coins safely tucked into my pocket, I walked the block to 17th Avenue and was immediately approached and asked if I had spare change.

“No, sorry,” I said. “No worries,” he responded, “Have a great day!”

Walking away I wondered why I had said no. Was it because I had to the two men that are usually under the underpass on my mind? Was it some kind of automatic unconscious response? Amazingly, while these questions were going through my mind someone else asked me for change and again I said no.

What the heck? Didn’t I intentionally put two coins in my pocket for THIS EXACT REASON?

And so I continued to 4th Street and toward the underpass completely perplexed by my response to those who asked for what I prepared to give and yet withheld. Long story, short, when I came home later that afternoon, those two coins were still in my pocket. The two men who usually sit under the underpass were not there when I passed on the way to my coffee meeting earlier.

~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~

Do you ever find yourself doing the opposite of what you well-meaningly and intentionally decided to do? Do you find it as bewildering as I do?

How Old Is Old?

18 Sunday Oct 2015

Posted by dianasschwenk in Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, Humour, In My Opinion, My Stories

≈ 79 Comments

Tags

200 words, aging, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, growing up, health, humour, judging, laughter, life, Life's like that, looking back, memories, old, young

Younger and older woman with hourglass

“To me old age is always fifteen years older than I am.” – Thomas Bailey Aldrich

“Oh man, I can’t wait till the year 2000, that’s gonna be a heck of a New Year’s party!” said the 16 year-old me. “Oh wait. I’ll be 37. Too old to party. If I’m even still alive! How sad.” That revelation ruined my day.

“Would you look at her. Geesh, 40 year-olds should NOT wear bikinis, I WON’T do that when I’m old,” said by the 25 year-old me to my best friend while sun-tanning on the shore of Paul Lake.

Fast forward to today, the 52 year-old me thinks back.

The 37 year-old me did not party in the year 2000. Not because she was too old, but because she didn’t want to.

The forty-something me continued to wear a bikini at the beach and was quite comfortable doing so. Recently my daughter posted this on her Facebook page: To get a bikini body, put on a bikini.

I guess old is mostly relative…

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

“See those two ladies sitting on the bench?” said by the 52 year-old me of the sixty-something year olds to my friend. “That’s us when we’re old!”

How old is old to you?

Dare To Do Our Duty

27 Sunday Sep 2015

Posted by dianasschwenk in Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, In My Opinion

≈ 44 Comments

Tags

200 words, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, doing the right thing, grace, growing up, integrity, judging, kindness, living in the moment, lost wallet, love, world issues

Lets have faith that right makes might; and in that faith let us, to the end, dare to do our duty as we understand it. – Abe Lincoln

941f1561a78c3f96768282ba235cde09Yesterday my friend Helga was telling me about a movie she recently saw about a man who finds a wallet.

The man who finds the wallet initially intends to return it; in the absence of ID, the man calls the name and number on a slip of paper he finds tucked deep in the wallet.

The person agrees to call the owner of the wallet and pass on the wallet-finding man’s contact information.

Later, the man finds a lottery ticket tucked into the wallet and checks the number.

It’s a winner.

And now the man begins to struggle with his initial intention.

It’s easy to judge this man.

We’d like to think that we would do the right thing.

But doing the right thing isn’t always easy.

If it were, wouldn’t everybody be doing it?

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

Often, doing the right thing takes us off track, or costs us in some way. I can’t help thinking that the price of not doing the right thing though, is ultimately more costly.

Standing On Sacred Ground

01 Sunday Feb 2015

Posted by dianasschwenk in Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, In My Opinion, My Stories

≈ 46 Comments

Tags

200 words, Burning bush, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, doing the right thing, God, grace, integrity, journey, judging, life, mission, sacred ground, spiritual, vision, Who I am

Let the refining and improving of your own life keep you so busy that you have little time to criticize others. ~ H. Jackson Brown Jr.

imagesHTL4L22WOne of the most life-changing letters I ever received was sent to me from a missionary in Guatemala when I was in my early twenties.

I was new in my faith and struggling with questions of judgment and grace and had written to him about it.

His reply to me referenced the Biblical Burning Bush story found in Exodus.

He told me my journey was my own. That I shouldn’t worry about other people and what they did on their journey. That God would reveal to me when I was standing on sacred ground and when it was time to remove my sandals from my feet.

Why is it that when we discover a truth about our own journey, we feel a need to impose it on everyone else? How does our way of doing something suddenly become the right way for everyone else to do it?

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

What would happen if instead of judging and correcting others, we sought solely to be the best version of ourselves?

Love Your Life!

09 Sunday Feb 2014

Posted by dianasschwenk in Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, In My Opinion

≈ 41 Comments

Tags

200 words, blessed, caring, courage, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, family, friends, grateful, growth, hard work, judging, learning, life, love, making a difference, opportunities, passion, Purpose, shadows, understanding

Fall truly, madly and deeply in love with your life; all of it, even the shadows, and never stop falling! ~ unknown

Fall madly in love with your life...

Fall madly in love with your life…

I read this quote the other day and thought to myself, “I want to be that person.”

In many ways, I already am. I consider myself quite blessed.

I love my family, my friends, this beautiful country I live in and the wonderful opportunities I’ve had, and still have, to make a difference in this world.

But what about the shadows?

For the most part, I love them too…

…love might not be the right word. I’m grateful for them.

But there are times, when I feel like I’m not measuring up

I’m not doing enough; working hard enough.

There are times when I feel like I haven’t been treated fairly

I haven’t been heard or understood

I’m being judged harshly.

These are things that I must accept as part of my life as well. Things that I must embrace and hold dear. After all, I learn from them. I grow. And isn’t that what love is all about anyway?

~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~

Entertaining Angels

05 Wednesday Jun 2013

Posted by dianasschwenk in Hump Day Chronicles, In My Opinion, My Stories, Out and About

≈ 33 Comments

Tags

17th Ave SW, blessed, Calgary, Diana Schwenk, friends, grateful, Homelessness, humbled, Hump Day Chronicles, Jesus, John the Baptist, judging, sacred ground, Tomkins Park, Truth

It was the first sunny day after way-too-many  days of rain in a row. I was so excited to get out there and soak in my much-needed hit of vitamin D.

After running a bunch of errands, I met up with my BFF for coffee in the park. This a favourite pastime of ours. We like to make up stories of the people we see and let me tell ya, 17th Ave is the perfect place to observe people!

Our people-watching, coffee-drinking bench - summer 2012

Our people-watching, coffee-drinking bench – summer 2012

So we were sitting there talking about our families and other current goings-on when out of the corner of my eye I noticed a homeless man approach us. I’d spied him with his friends earlier but they were a ways off and now he was approaching us.

I’m going to steer away from this story for a moment to say that I had spent 20 years of my life working for an organization that cares for the homeless and I’d learned a lot from them about what’s really important in this world. I’m not a stranger to the sector. I’m not afraid of people who are experiencing homelessness. And I’m not proud of the rest of this story, in fact, I’m a little ashamed because I know better.

Ok, back to my story… I just really wasn’t wanting an encounter with a homeless person at that moment. I think I mumbled something like, ‘Oh here we go’  under my breath. I was annoyed. Me and my BFF were having a good conversation. We hadn’t seen each other in a few days and I didn’t feel like getting pan-handled!

So, this man approaches us with his hand out (not to receive change, but offered as in a handshake) and I’m thinking to myself, “I am NOT shaking your hand!” He said something that I didn’t quite catch and then followed up with, “Jesus will be coming soon and He loves you and I LOVE YOU TOO!”

Ok, this is me steering away from the story again for a moment. Some of you know that I am a Christian. You may also know that I have been embarrassed about the way Christians are perceived at times so it’s not something I just come out with when I first meet someone. More on that in this post, if you’re interested

His words cut through all the crap I was thinking like a hot knife through butter. I extended my hand to him and told him Jesus and me, we both loved him too. We chatted a bit more and then he was off to the next bench to bring his message of love to someone else.

Now I know that not all my readers are Christians and that’s OK. That’s not what this story is about for me. It’s about judging people by appearance and making up my mind, before he even spoke, about how this encounter would play out.

If you are familiar with the Bible at all, you would have read about John the Baptist. John lived in the wilderness and to the casual observer he would have given the impression that he was a lunatic. In today’s world we may even say he is mentally ill. I mean seriously, he ate locusts, ranted and raved to passers-by about their hypocrisy and I’m guessing he may not have smelled so good. John however, is the man who Christians the world over recognize as the one chosen to prepare the way for Jesus.

Shame on me for judging another human being in the park before he even spoke a word. In my heart I judged him, yet in his heart he wanted only to bless me – and that he did.

Ok back to the story one last time. As he walked away I couldn’t help feeling that I was on sacred ground – that I had been reminded of an important truth. And I was grateful. I turned to look at my BFF – yanno – to share this special moment with her and was surprised to see her laughing!

“What’s so funny??”

“Didn’t you hear he what he said when he first came over?”

“No, I didn’t quite catch it, what did he say?”

“He said,” she managed to spit out in spite of her giggling fit, “He said…as he was reaching his hand out to you…It’s ‘Be Nice to Old People Day’!”

~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~

Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it. ~ Hebrews 13:2

Related articles
  • Not Appropriate: Homeless Jesus (simonebrosig.wordpress.com)

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