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'I knew this would happen. The scorekeeper and time-clock official have been throwing elbows and talking trash the entire game.'

Teach us to give and not to count the cost. ~Saint Ignatius

I ADMIT IT. I’VE ALWAYS BEEN a bit of a scorekeeper. I don’t like that about myself. But it’s true.

To be fair, I used to be way worse. I’d like to think I’ve grown as a person during the half century I’ve been on earth. And really, I mostly keep score when I feel indebted to someone.

You know, as in ‘you paid for breakfast last time so I can’t sleep peacefully until I buy you breakfast and then we’re even,’ kind of way?

But the concept that I might keep score, especially when I begin to feel as though I’m always giving and someone else is always taking, is not a foreign one to me either.

So what is my motivation for giving?

Don’t get me wrong, sometimes when I give, it’s from a place of love and compassion. But when I give because I feel indebted, or I give because I expect my giving will be reciprocated, can that truly be called giving?

When I give, I want to give without counting the cost.


What kind of giver are you?