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200 words, annoying people, curious, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, growing up, irritate, learning, lessons, rub the wrong way, Who I am
“Personally I’m always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught. ” ~ Winston Churchill
I am fairly curious. I love learning stuff.
Like how I recently learned that although children get more individual vaccination shots these days than when I was a kid, in total they get less of a dose.
Or that Saguenay, Quebec has the longest winter in Canada – a total of 160 days! (note to self: Never relocate to Saguenay, Quebec)
Whether I’m watching a documentary, chatting with an expert in a specific field, or reading about an interesting subject here in the blogosphere, I love learning new things.
However, I’m not always a fan of someone pointing out the error of my ways, or even worse, when I find myself irritated, not by what someone says, but by the way I find myself reacting to them.
Much to my chagrin, as far as self-awareness goes and growing into the person I am, and continue to become, nothing else is as effective as annoying people and irritating situations.
~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~
Can you think of an important lesson or revelation you learned from someone who initially rubbed you the wrong way?
rachelcarrera said:
As my grandma always used to tell me, “Consider the source.” That said, I try to evaluate if the person is being mean on purpose or is oblivious as to how they’re coming across.
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dianasschwenk said:
Yup, consider the source is a good one – smart grandma Rachel! ❤
Diana xo
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rachelcarrera said:
She was wise in certain things, for sure. 🙂
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Wendy L. Macdonald said:
Diana, I’m learning how to agree to disagree with gentleness and respect each time someone rubs me the wrong way. When I can turn the other cheek and find common ground, then I learn so much more than if I were to lash out. After the initial sting settles down, I look for truth. If there is none, I keep a safe distance while extending grace.
Some people aren’t looking to be pleased–they’re looking for trouble. Grace may be the sun that melts their ice.
Thanks for another intriguing post.
Warm blessings ~ Wendy ❀
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dianasschwenk said:
Well said Wendy! ❤
Diana xo
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Sue Slaght said:
Decades ago I had a nursing instructor who relentlessly picked on me in our small group of students. I almost quit nursing school. In the end I decided to show her how great as nurse I actually was. I would prepare for my patient assignment as well be able to help other students. She found it difficult to find anything to pick on. I often reflect on that time. I think she made me a better nurse actually and she definitely taught me some resiliency skills.
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dianasschwenk said:
Growing pains! I had a boss like that too. He didn’t end up in my close circle of friends, but he sure pushed me to be my best. 😀
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Wyrd Smythe said:
There’s an old joke about a mule, the punchline of which is, “First you have to get their attention.” Annoying, irritating, or just very critical, people usually get your attention. Whether they offer value is another matter, but if they do, they certainly have your attention.
(There’s also something to that we learn more from our mistakes than we do from our successes. We tend to remember them more clearly (or painfully).)
I’ve been thinking about your closing question since yesterday… There are those who I found annoying, but the ones that offered value seemed to offer value to me from the start. It may come from having worked in “the arts” where there are a lot of annoying but brilliant people, so I don’t place the same value on personality that others seem to do.
I’ve said many, many times that I’d rather work with a highly competent asshole than an incompetent nice person. Nice is a nice quality, but I value competence more. (Perhaps because I know I’m annoying but competent. 😮 )
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dianasschwenk said:
So no one-moment situation then Smitty? I can’t think of a particular situation either but I can name the people! ❤
Diana xo
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Wyrd Smythe said:
I haven’t thought of one so far, but I’m famously forgetful of my past. And there are certainly people I’ve found annoying one way or another, but so far I can’t think of any that proved me wrong about my first impressions.
(If anything, over time, I’ve come to trust my first impressions — they’re usually right I’ve found. It may come from a life-long severe hearing loss that has me paying a lot more attention to facial expressions and body postures — things that are more revealing than our words.)
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Minuscule Moments said:
Diana I am a firm believer we only hear what we were meant to hear. Even if its not positive. I still walk away and think about it, take what I need from it and come away a little wiser. Negative people can teach us many things. As long as we stand tall and believe in our worth.
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dianasschwenk said:
Well said Kath! ❤
Diana xo
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Sheryl said:
I agree–We all makes mistakes, and can learn so much when we aren’t self-defensive..
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dianasschwenk said:
Sheryl, I tend to get defensive, so I try to just stay quiet until I’ve had time to process. Usually when I give myself time, I see value for myself; whether that is something new I can do or dismissing the feedback given altogether. ❤
Diana xo
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ChrisB said:
Wise words, thanks. Oh to have the mindfulness to be able to ‘see’ what is causing the irriatation in us, what were our expectations?
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks Chris. Live and learn, right? ❤
Diana xo
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earthriderjudyberman said:
Diana … I have learned that I have something in common with those who irritate me. Those are the things I know I need to change. 😉 But I also have learned that I can be lonely all by myself … I don’t need to be in the company of people who make me feel like that. Those are the folks I avoid.
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dianasschwenk said:
Smart move Judy. ❤
Diana xo
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joannerambling said:
No I can’t remember any such experience but that isn’t to say there hasn’t been one or more just that my memory is shit……………….
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dianasschwenk said:
I’m sure there is Jo-Anne, hard to go through life without running across it. ❤
Diana xo
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elizabeth2560 said:
With my mother ailing I have spent more time with my siblings over the past five months than at any time over the past fifty years. I have found that certain aspects of their characters / attitudes annoy and irritate me. However, what is the most annoying part of that is that when I analyze why they irritate me, it is because they are like me in many ways and they remind me of the annoying bits of myself. 🙂
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dianasschwenk said:
I know what you mean Elizabeth and it’s both annoying and enlightening, isn’t it? I’m glad you’ve been able to spend more time with your siblings Elizabeth. Family is everything. ❤
Diana xo
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Healing Grief said:
Great post and quote Diana as we can all relate to this! Being annoyed is a normal emotion and you are right, sometimes it comes up to teach us something, and sometimes it’s a sign we are tired and need a hug 🙂
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dianasschwenk said:
Yes Karen! Sometimes I just need a hug! Good point! ❤
Diana xo
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markbialczak said:
No, Diana, I just turn them off, and ignore them for the rest of their life or mine, whichever comes first.
I don’t mind criticism, given constructively, delivered with the proper motive. And I’ll learn gladly from these situations.
Given in a mean way, though, from people who thrive from making others feel small, and I’ll either lash out and go away or turn the cheek or go away. But I will go away.
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dianasschwenk said:
Mark I absolutely agree. If someone is just destructive and mean, I am outta there!
It’s funny, when I wrote the post, I wasn’t even thinking about plain old meanness or people with a superiority complex. I do see life through rosy-coloured glasses, don’t I? ❤
Diana xo
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markbialczak said:
You do, my dear Diana. Good for you. I have encountered too much of the meanness to not consider it, unfortunately,
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dianasschwenk said:
Sorry to hear that Mark. Glad you’ve come through it a wonderfully kind and beautiful man. 🙂
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Alan A. Malizia: Contagious Optimism! Co-Author said:
Diana, the truth will effect us in that way-an annoyance. That is why it is best to regularly examine our own consciences when alone and quiet. We will receive the truth about ourselves from an infallible source; and I don’t mean ourselves.
Anyone who presumes to point out an error in another must be certain of their own infallibility. “First remove the beam from your own eye, before you remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”
-Alan
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks Alan. I think motivation also plays a part; is it from a place of love or is it a malicious attack. Don’t you think? ❤
Diana xo
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Alan A. Malizia: Contagious Optimism! Co-Author said:
Yes, I do agree Diana. And I believe the question that needs to be asked is: Is the need to get invloved, about me or about the other person? If about me, then that could lend to the malicious, or at best a self -validation. If about the other, with no consideration of self, then it is an act of love-tough love though it may be.
Opinions coming from a known to be selfish person will likely be taken with a grain of salt. Those opinions coming from the selfless person can be taken to heart. For the selfless person truly knows love, and desires what is best, no matter how difficult to achieve, for another.
-Alan
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russtowne said:
What a terrific post, Dianna. It was especially timely for me and is helping me to change my attitude toward a person and situation. Thank you for being there, my friend.
Russ
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dianasschwenk said:
My pleasure Russ, I’m glad it spoke to you. ❤
Diana xo
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susielindau said:
I learned a while ago to laugh at myself. Chagrin averted!
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dianasschwenk said:
You are, indeed, gifted with that ability Susie! ❤
Diana xo
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Chatter Master said:
I enjoyed this post. It spoke completely to me. Like you sat me down and said I need to pay attention. Like you I am in love with learning new things. I have become more aware of what annoys me…..because in those moments of solitude I’m usually pondering WHY it annoys me so much when it is thrust in to my awareness….. OH NO!!!! Because that’s me. I can’t think of a specific right now…..but I am all too familiar with the feeling of becoming aware.
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dianasschwenk said:
I know what you’re saying Colleen and when it happens in clusters, I just about lose my mind! ❤
Diana xo
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Jennifer's Journal said:
What I’ve learned from people who I find irritating or upsetting is to learn from their bad example, and not to behave that way myself! 😉
Jennifer xo
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dianasschwenk said:
haha! Yes Jennifer, that definitely is a lesson one can learn as well. I recently heard again somewhere: sometimes when trying to figure out what you want, it helps to identify what you don’t want! ❤
Diana xo
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Ian Munro @ leadingessentially.com said:
I love the Churchill quote, and the subject overall got me thinking about the value of discomfort in learning, in that it rarely happens when we are in our comfort zone.
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dianasschwenk said:
So very true Ian!
Diana xo
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Val Boyko said:
Great post Diana! Triggers are our best teachers 🙂
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dianasschwenk said:
Yes. I don’t like it though but working on appreciating this fact, even saying thank you when it happens Val! ❤
Diana xo
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bulldog said:
Afraid not… the people that rub me up the wrong way get ignored if they are lucky… push too far and I react, but it is wonderful to learn something new everyday and this is probably what keeps me coming back to all the blogs I follow…
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dianasschwenk said:
Ha! You are one of the most honest people I know bulldog! ❤
Diana xo
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Ann Koplow said:
I love everything I learn here, Diana! This post reminds me of one of my favorite quotes from Carl Jung:
“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks Ann! So true, and often we see ourselves reflected in the very thing that annoys us about another, don’t you think? ❤
Diana xo
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Ann Koplow said:
I do, Diana!
Ann xo
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billgncs said:
yes, I’ve heard it paraphrased as “our own shortcomings in others really ticks us off.”
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dianasschwenk said:
I’ve lived it Bill! ❤
Diana xo
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billgncs said:
we really discover it in our kids 🙂
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dianasschwenk said:
haha when they mirror our behavior back to us, right?!
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