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4 Generations of Women, children, daughters, Diana Schwenk, family, growing up, Hump Day Chronicles, life, memories, Mothers, Relationships
I had always thought, without really thinking at all, that four generations might take me back to at least the 1800s. But four generations isn’t really that long. The years between my Oma’s birth and my daughter’s birth only number 73. The number of years that all four of us were alive at the same time is only seven. When I look at it in these terms our lives really are just a drop in the bucket in the grand scheme of time.
When I started on this series it was important for me to tell the stories without judgement. In writing the first one, judgement showed up almost immediately, so I scrapped it and started again. Judgement showed up again. It was then I decided to write this series in the third person, as if I was a journalist just interested in facts. And it worked! Writing in the third person allowed me to write from an emotionally detached place.
I don’t think we should live in the past, but we mustn’t pass up the opportunity to understand what made our ancestors the way they were. Often through understanding, comes forgiveness and forgiveness frees us to live with joy. Obviously, these posts are just snippets of stories and glimpses into moments of time. But there is enough there to see themes that have threaded their way through the generations, like: anger, strength, leaving home at a young age, with at least three of us, moving far enough away from home that we couldn’t just drop by for coffee!
As for missing details, not sharing everything was also an intentional decision. As I stated up front, I wanted to seek out permission before publishing each post. As you can imagine, perhaps even from your own family stories, there are things too painful to speak outside of one’s family, there are things that feel shameful to us, even if they wouldn’t be viewed as such and maybe in the long run it’s for the best. Maybe our lessons are best learned and understood through living them, rather than through the experiences of others. Whatever the case, we the three remaining, know those missing details and they help us to understand, forgive, grow and make us strong.
Future Generations of Women – a picture of 100 years from now
I am a dreamer with a vivid imagination, (I really can’t help it!) so I thought it might be fun to take a look ahead at one amazing woman who will be born in my family by exploring a moment in time on one single day in the future.
It is the year 2114. My 15-year-old, great, great, great, great-granddaughter, perhaps named after one of us, has just had a devastating experience. She’s not sure how to handle it, who she should tell, if she should tell anyone, or if anyone would even understand.
She remembers her mother’s trunk that holds the recorded history of the women in her family, a tradition that was continued by her great, great, great-grandmother, Michaela with stories contributed by her daughters and their daughters after them. She begins to read it starting with my posts, and at first she is disappointed because of the lack of details – she has so many questions!
As she continues to read the stories written by generations of her ancestors, she begins to see patterns. She sees where these women struggled, where they screwed up, where they picked up the pieces and created a better future. They are far from perfect, but they seem to possess incredible resilience and strength. They become so alive to her that she feels she can reach out and touch them.
She marvels at the lives of these women. Each generation seems to have discerned the things that are bad and the things that are good and have created a new reality – one that reflects their values and vision for them and their daughters. “I wonder if they knew they were doing that,” she ponders.
Suddenly she knows that she too, will overcome. She opens her journal and writes… “Today, something horrible has happened to me but I will find help and will figure it out, I’m going to be OK…”
~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~
Related posts:
Our Families and Why We Are the Way We Are
Four Generations of Women – Part 1
Four Generations of Women – Part 2
Jean said:
I know the feeling –my family is far away and one day (far into the future) I will no longer be around: Remember me for my true stories, the pictures and my art I’ve offered to you. Enjoy, maybe learn from them and may you grow and may I help you –via my blog.
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dianasschwenk said:
A lovely thought Jean – may it come to pass!
Diana xo
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Professions for PEACE said:
Filled with love and light in every word! Bless your heart Diana. I love all your writing.
Hugs, Gina xo
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you Gina – the feeling is mutual!
Diana xo
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Jennifer's Journal said:
I don’t want to sound like I live in the past, but for some reason I am fascinated with bygone times and ancestors. The stories one could mine from senior relatives are endless. More bloggers should go in that direction, I think. Terrific series, Diana!
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks Jennifer! I think stories are amazing. I can remember sitting at Opa’s feet, looking up at him as he told me stories of days gone by… those are some of my favourite memories!
Diana xo
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Jennifer's Journal said:
I bet they are precious memories. Btw, I love that work of art! Who is the artist?
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dianasschwenk said:
I’m sorry, I do not know…
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cyclingrandma said:
Fun way to think. I’m not much of a science fiction /fantasy reader or writer– yet now that I have a grand daughter– (and grandsons) I do wonder what the world will be like for them and their children and beyond and how they’ll remember me. I know being with them makes me remember my grandparents. (I hear myself saying some of the same things…)
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dianasschwenk said:
It’s interesting how history repeats itself, isn’t it Lisa? One of the things I love about the www is that future generations will get a better glimpse into their family history through the blogs that are written.
Diana xo
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Jean said:
Yes, hopefully our own posts will help other family members down along the road of life.
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Sheryl said:
Beautiful–I love how you projected the story of the interconnectedness of the women in your family out into the future.
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Drjcwash said:
Thank you. It is so important to look into the future with hope. Loved these posts.
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you so much, appreciate you stopping by.
Diana xo
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elizabeth2560 said:
This is a wonderful post. Like your great-great-great-great-grand-daughter I too find comfort in the spirit of the women who went before me.
(Is the painting monet or renoir?)
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dianasschwenk said:
I have no clue Elizabeth, it doesn’t look like a Monet to me though…
Thanks for your kind words, as always.
Diana xo
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russtowne said:
I LOVE this post! Everything about it. I found myself smiling inwardly while experiencing it, and as I read the last part of it, a broad smile had spread across my face. Well done, Diana!
Russ
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dianasschwenk said:
Thank you Russ. Ahh to be able to travel in time and see how it unravels…
Diana xo
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billgncs said:
sometimes judging is the best thing we do. Without it, there can be no good or evil. To accept everything as equal does a great disservcie. But on the otherhand this is your story 🙂
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dianasschwenk said:
Well we make judgements every day, don’t we? I had it in my heart to write this without judgement because it’s not about blame or guilt to me – I just wanted to tell the stories – it is and it was what it is. Thanks, as always, for dropping in Bill!
Diana xo
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billgncs said:
don’t go values neutral on me – they navigate via the Northern Light 🙂
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dianasschwenk said:
haha Too much pressure for the Northern Light!
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billgncs said:
I think the light is both stronger and brighter than it knows.
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bulldog said:
Brilliant wrap up… I still see a book in here somewhere…
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks bulldog, maybe one day. 🙂
Diana xo
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sedge808 said:
Thank you for sharing.
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks for coming along Gavin!
Diana
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Margot Schwenk said:
Is there a possibility to have a fifth Generation of woman if Michaela got a little girl somedays?
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dianasschwenk said:
Yes but you will have to talk to Michaela about that! Thanks for stopping by Mom!
Diana xo
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susielindau said:
Love your idea! Are you writing a book?
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks Susie, no book, not now anyway – just this series of posts. I am kind of sad that’s it’s over though…
Diana xo
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Louise Gallagher said:
Love. Love. Love!
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dianasschwenk said:
Thanks Louise, it was fun to write! I was talking to my Dad the other day and he said he could probably fill me in on the 5th generation. Talking to him made me think I should do a series on the men’s side about my paternal grandfather, my dad, my brother and his son – we’ll see!
Diana xo
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Tracy Lee Karner said:
Do it! Expand it all (maybe with details from history–what was going on in the world, current events of the time), and then put it all together in a book!
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dianasschwenk said:
(smiling) Maybe one day, I will do just that Tracy – thank you!
Diana xo
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Tracy Lee Karner said:
I know the feeling — so many great ideas; so little time… 😉
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