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200 words, Against or With?, Diana Schwenk, Diana's Enormous Book of Quotes, humour, learning, living in the moment, mentors, Purpose, true to yourself, wisdom
Some of the worst mistakes in my life were haircuts. ~ Jim Morrison
Bad Hair Day
Why did I ever think that cutting my own hair would be a good idea?
What about that period of time I dyed my hair bleached-blond? Or the time I forgot to rinse the dye out on time?
And what was up with that short, short hair in my late 30’s??
It’s hard to know what I was thinking, but one lesson that stands out is that when I’ve tried to do new things without seeking the help of professionals or tried to be someone who I’m not, the results weren’t pretty!
Why do I fight against the natural tendencies of my hair instead of working with them?
Could this be true in my everyday life as well?
Like when I’ve taken on new things without seeking counsel from someone who’s been there?
Or when I’ve tried to tow the company line when it scratched against my own values?
It’s funny how I’ve worked so hard against some things instead of working with them.
~ DIANA’S ENORMOUS BOOK OF QUOTES ~
Do you find yourself working against your natural abilities?
talktodiana 
You look great just as you were, and are so, why ‘harass’ yourself?
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Thanks Dave. I’m not really harassing myself; more reflecting on a tendancy to force things, rather than work with the flow of one’s natural gifts and abilities in areas where one can make the most difference.
Diana xo
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I’ve had to think about this one a bit. As usual, you hit on a basic truth. As usual, the contrarian in me can’t help but think of those occasional exceptions; in this case, times when I’ve ventured off into a new project and deliberately wanted to know as little going in as possible. I wanted to discover for myself how to get from “A” to “B” without any influence. The point truly was the journey, not the destination, so getting there efficiently (or at all sometimes) wasn’t important (or as important).
As I think about it, the exceptions I can think of were creative projects. Maybe its when the goal is your own creativity that one needs to take some care not to be overly influenced by “prior art” or expectations of others or even “getting it right.” Creativity is often about breaking new ground!
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Thanks Smitty. Yes you’re right. And it sounds like you trust your strengths and work them instead of against them when you engage in creative projects – and I think that’s just awesome!
Diana xo
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That sounds like a good way to put it (and I certainly like the idea of being awesome). Sometimes one might choose to “re-invent the wheel” (because in replowing the ground you might come up with some improvement no one thought of), but you do have to have some faith in your wheel-inventing skills! Or at least in your ability to plow ground!
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I sense you possess this wheel inventing faith!
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It comes from having been there and doing that (and then buying the tee-shirt). I’ve found it comes as much, or more, from your failures as from your successes. As your own post shows, one tends to remember the failures! 😀
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p.s. You don’t dye your hair, do you??? 😉
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😆 No, but I do cut it. (Which is pretty easy ever since I decided I was “done with hair” and have been sporting a buzz cut ever since.)
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Such a great post, as always 🙂 I think we do tend to throw ourselves in situations unfairly at times, instead of flowing with our natural abilities. I definitely find myself working against my natural abilities. Naturally, I’m a caretaker, a healer, a soother. Yet more often than not, I throw myself into such worries about things that I have no energy to heal, care, or soothe.
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Caitlin, I can totally see that you are a healer! Thank you for stopping by and leaving a comment. And no worries, it seems as you get older it gets easier to say no to things that don’t make sense for you.
Diana xo
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I am happy to report that (and you are aware of my entering a new decade)….. I am still a NATURAL blond (no grey) at sixty years of age and have NEVER coloured my hair. (Unfortunately I cannot say the same about the stupid hair-perms I have had over the years, rather than be content with my straight hair).
as for the natural abilities…. I am working on that one after too many absent years of following the recipe that was not my taste.
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I have seen people with dark hair that don’t go grey, but never a blond that hasn’t gone grey! Elizabeth you work against your straight hair, and I use a flat iron to get straight hair! My hair is neither straight nor curly, or even wavy, it just has these odd kinks in it and sections of frizz!
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🙂
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Another well-written post my friend! Filled with wisdom to ponder and humour too 😀 so thank you for sharing Diana. And here’s to one plus for -20C: an excuse to wear hats! hugs, Gina xo
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Yes Gina, hats cover a multitude of sins! 😉
Diana xo
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I cannot accept my hair the way it is naturally because I’m going gray and I’m not ready to give up on the dye jobs just yet. Besides that, I have enough hair on my head for three people if I don’t: A. straighten it, B. put lots of product in it, or C. keep it short. Did I mention I don’t like it short? So now you know all about this love/hate relationship I’m having with my thick, curly mop. 😉
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Oh I have nothing against dying, but now I choose a reasonable colour!
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Reasonable?
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I stopped trying to look like Barbie with bleached hair, I saw photos, it looked stupid, plus I don’t have the tiny waist, 4 ft legs and huge cazongas to go with the image! 😉
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Ha ha, who does? What is your natural colour?
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pretty much the colour it is except for the Cruela Deville chunk on the right side!
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Ha ha..you don’t like it any more, I take it.
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If the grey was evenly distributed, but a chunk here and splotches along the hair line and hardly none in the back – no, I’m not a fan. Choosing a colour close to my natural colour (dark blond) actually lets me grow it out for longer periods of time (3-4 months) before needing to re-dye it. It just looks like it has depth!
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I hear ya. I am no stranger to a bad hair day. Sometimes I have bad hair months.- and when I look back at old pics it looks like I had some bad hair DECADES. 🙂
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I swing between embracing and fighting. Really, I just keep wishing my natural tendencies and abilities drew me to something like accounting. Practical, satisfying, marketable. 😀
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Aww that’s too bad, because as they say, when you follow your heart and are true to you, you draw that very thing into your life!
Diana xo
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In that case, you should expect big hair to be back in fashion any day now 😉
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It will come back, it always does!
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Excellent, I’ve gotten very tired of wrestling with the straightening iron 😀
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Sometimes I am glad I don’t have much hair anymore.
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Haha – love your attitude of gratitude just4luck!
Diana
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This is fantastic, Diana! I’ve seriously been pondering why the hell I don’t just accept my hair as it is, and work with it instead of working against it and always hating it.
That very argument spills over into everything. I definitely tend to focus more on the abilities I wish I had rather than honing in on the ones that naturally come to me. It’s that grass is always greener curse, and I definitely try to bring awareness to it these days rather than living in that purgatory.
It feels so good to accept things as they are, to love them, to be with them…rather than wishing you were anything and anywhere but what or where you actually are.
Another enlightened post, and a great topic for me to ponder today, thanks! 🙂
~Andrea<3
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Thanks Andrea! I think we should always be honing our skills and gifts and dedicating some time to areas where we might grow. I read somewhere that one should spend 90% on developing our strengths and 10% developing our weaknesses. For instance I have natural skills in building relationships, inspiring, motivating but I had to learn new skills to interpret data, and develop revenue and expense budgets in my line of work.
Diana xo
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I like that 90 – 10 split focus, that makes good sense!
You sure do have natural skills in those areas, Diana! 🙂 Keep em’ coming, the world needs more of it!
~A<3
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I cannot cut my own hair not that I have tried but I am pretty sure I would screw it up something bad, I am lucky I don’t screw up my day to day life since I am something of a screw up…………….oh hang on that is my sister Sue not me, I am a level headed sensible girl…………..
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haha! Must be nice – you should teach workshops Jo-anne!
Diana xo
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I argue with myself all the time; it’s exhausting. Love the hair analogy.
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haha I’m just picturing what that might look like! 🙂
Diana xo
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Bald – hahahha!
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I cut my own hair.
I’ve gotten good at it over many years 🙂
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I’ve been cutting my own bangs! Shhh don’t tell anyone….
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🙂
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Great comparison…how to style your hair, style your life that fit and enhance your natural strengths. 🙂 It’s taken me a ….long time but not as long as some other people.
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It just so much easier to be yourself on all accounts, isn’t it? So glad you’re at home with who you are.
Diana xo
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I like the way you connect this to life – and it’s so true. Why do we fight against ‘it’ so much?!
But, in thinking about hair specifically…oh you should see the purple headed one ha ha ha! It is just not holding and is such a mess of colours (mostly white, grey) except for a day or two after she does it. Makes no difference if the professionals do it (other than $$)…
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Purple? Well that makes a statement doesn’t it?? haha
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oh yeah 🙂
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Woooah…this subject could easily be used in the psychologists chair as a perfect example of who we are! We have all at one time or another attempted to be someone we’re not…and this repetitive behaviour continues all through life whether we like it or not. And often we don’t even know we’re doing it. I laugh at the silly stuff I’ve done trying to please others instead of using my ‘natural abilities’ and just being myself. It’s all a learning curve…and unfortunately, when you think you’ve learnt it all…you suddenly go to a place called heaven. Or maybe, that’s the point of it all 🙂
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so true… and maybe it’s part of the steps we need to take while we discover who we are, who knows?
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I love this post! I find myself going against a lot of things unintentionally especially my natural abilities and recently I’m learning to work with “what is” and accept things as they are……. so for me I would say that it does apply with everything………. what happened when you forgot to rinse out the dye? 🙂
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My hair turned into straw and broke easily. I had to cut a lot of it off!
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Awww… 😦 so sorry to hear that………
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I spent my teen years trying to straighten my hair.. and then stopped. Thankfully. Now I don’t even blow it dry and only trust the hairdresser to dye it after a one-time fiasco where one side turned ketchup red. Learned my lesson!
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Ouch that would be tough. Once I bleached mine, went swimming in a pool and the chlorine combined with the dye turned my hair green!
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When I was younger I used to tease up my hair a lot of times to make it look fuller. The end results are that my hair is getting thinner and I don’t want to blame it on mother nature.
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Yes Mom, I can still see you running around the house looking for your comb that was attached to your hair! I love your hair, the colour and everything!
Diana xo
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I LOVE this post, Diana, thanks to your natural abilities.
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Thank you very much Ann!
Diana xo
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Most of the time…. is this not normal? I thought it was….
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haha I love your feisty spunk bulldog!
Diana xo
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