Could Bad Hair Days Be My Own Fault?

Some of the worst mistakes in my life were haircuts. ~ Jim Morrison

Bad Hair Day

Bad Hair Day

Why did I ever think that cutting my own hair would be a good idea?

What about that period of time I dyed my hair bleached-blond? Or the time I forgot to rinse the dye out on time?

And what was up with that short, short hair in my late 30’s??

It’s hard to know what I was thinking, but one lesson that stands out is that when I’ve tried to do new things without seeking the help of professionals or tried to be someone who I’m not, the results weren’t pretty!

Why do I fight against the natural tendencies of my hair instead of working with them?

Could this be true in my everyday life as well?

Like when I’ve taken on new things without seeking counsel from someone who’s been there?

Or when I’ve tried to tow the company line when it scratched against my own values?

It’s funny how I’ve worked so hard against some things instead of working with them.


Do you find yourself working against your natural abilities?

61 thoughts on “Could Bad Hair Days Be My Own Fault?

    • Thanks Dave. I’m not really harassing myself; more reflecting on a tendancy to force things, rather than work with the flow of one’s natural gifts and abilities in areas where one can make the most difference.
      Diana xo

  1. I’ve had to think about this one a bit. As usual, you hit on a basic truth. As usual, the contrarian in me can’t help but think of those occasional exceptions; in this case, times when I’ve ventured off into a new project and deliberately wanted to know as little going in as possible. I wanted to discover for myself how to get from “A” to “B” without any influence. The point truly was the journey, not the destination, so getting there efficiently (or at all sometimes) wasn’t important (or as important).

    As I think about it, the exceptions I can think of were creative projects. Maybe its when the goal is your own creativity that one needs to take some care not to be overly influenced by “prior art” or expectations of others or even “getting it right.” Creativity is often about breaking new ground!

  2. Such a great post, as always :) I think we do tend to throw ourselves in situations unfairly at times, instead of flowing with our natural abilities. I definitely find myself working against my natural abilities. Naturally, I’m a caretaker, a healer, a soother. Yet more often than not, I throw myself into such worries about things that I have no energy to heal, care, or soothe.

    • Caitlin, I can totally see that you are a healer! Thank you for stopping by and leaving a comment. And no worries, it seems as you get older it gets easier to say no to things that don’t make sense for you.
      Diana xo

  3. I am happy to report that (and you are aware of my entering a new decade)….. I am still a NATURAL blond (no grey) at sixty years of age and have NEVER coloured my hair. (Unfortunately I cannot say the same about the stupid hair-perms I have had over the years, rather than be content with my straight hair).

    as for the natural abilities…. I am working on that one after too many absent years of following the recipe that was not my taste.

  4. I cannot accept my hair the way it is naturally because I’m going gray and I’m not ready to give up on the dye jobs just yet. Besides that, I have enough hair on my head for three people if I don’t: A. straighten it, B. put lots of product in it, or C. keep it short. Did I mention I don’t like it short? So now you know all about this love/hate relationship I’m having with my thick, curly mop. ;)

  5. I swing between embracing and fighting. Really, I just keep wishing my natural tendencies and abilities drew me to something like accounting. Practical, satisfying, marketable. :D

  6. This is fantastic, Diana! I’ve seriously been pondering why the hell I don’t just accept my hair as it is, and work with it instead of working against it and always hating it.
    That very argument spills over into everything. I definitely tend to focus more on the abilities I wish I had rather than honing in on the ones that naturally come to me. It’s that grass is always greener curse, and I definitely try to bring awareness to it these days rather than living in that purgatory.
    It feels so good to accept things as they are, to love them, to be with them…rather than wishing you were anything and anywhere but what or where you actually are.
    Another enlightened post, and a great topic for me to ponder today, thanks! :)

    • Thanks Andrea! I think we should always be honing our skills and gifts and dedicating some time to areas where we might grow. I read somewhere that one should spend 90% on developing our strengths and 10% developing our weaknesses. For instance I have natural skills in building relationships, inspiring, motivating but I had to learn new skills to interpret data, and develop revenue and expense budgets in my line of work.
      Diana xo

  7. I cannot cut my own hair not that I have tried but I am pretty sure I would screw it up something bad, I am lucky I don’t screw up my day to day life since I am something of a screw up…………….oh hang on that is my sister Sue not me, I am a level headed sensible girl…………..

  8. Great comparison…how to style your hair, style your life that fit and enhance your natural strengths. :) It’s taken me a ….long time but not as long as some other people.

  9. I like the way you connect this to life – and it’s so true. Why do we fight against ‘it’ so much?!

    But, in thinking about hair specifically…oh you should see the purple headed one ha ha ha! It is just not holding and is such a mess of colours (mostly white, grey) except for a day or two after she does it. Makes no difference if the professionals do it (other than $$)…

  10. Woooah…this subject could easily be used in the psychologists chair as a perfect example of who we are! We have all at one time or another attempted to be someone we’re not…and this repetitive behaviour continues all through life whether we like it or not. And often we don’t even know we’re doing it. I laugh at the silly stuff I’ve done trying to please others instead of using my ‘natural abilities’ and just being myself. It’s all a learning curve…and unfortunately, when you think you’ve learnt it all…you suddenly go to a place called heaven. Or maybe, that’s the point of it all :)

  11. I love this post! I find myself going against a lot of things unintentionally especially my natural abilities and recently I’m learning to work with “what is” and accept things as they are……. so for me I would say that it does apply with everything………. what happened when you forgot to rinse out the dye? :-)

  12. I spent my teen years trying to straighten my hair.. and then stopped. Thankfully. Now I don’t even blow it dry and only trust the hairdresser to dye it after a one-time fiasco where one side turned ketchup red. Learned my lesson!

  13. When I was younger I used to tease up my hair a lot of times to make it look fuller. The end results are that my hair is getting thinner and I don’t want to blame it on mother nature.

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